am i the only crazy one out here?

Greetings Munchkins!

It's been a struggle for me lately to make art.
To make time...
to feel inspired...
to be in the right heart space...
(heart space is always more important than head space)

For those of you out there
who blog and share your art with the world...
do you ever wonder why you do?
I do.
i've been thinking on this a lot lately.
Initially, i did it for me.
I began blogging and sharing because i wanted to get
more comfortable with having my work out there.

Then it slowly transitioned into
less about me
and more about others...
Without wanting to sound religious,
I felt like i could be of service somehow.
Like this was my way
of giving back to the world.
If i could inspire or encourage ONE person out there to make art
(and thus to feel happier, because making art = feeling happier),
then my job was done.
The more people i could inspire
to make that connection with their own hearts - 
and shut the rest of the world off,
the happier this planet would be. 
Did i really believe this?
(yes, i secretly did - and still do)

The world may be happier just one tiny person at a time,
one tiny heart at a time,
but it'll be happier, because that's what art does.
That's what music does.
That's what nature does.
That's what poetry does.
It makes us forget about the yucky stuff that surrounds us -
the things that  suffocate us during the day...
like crappy jobs
and toxic relationships
& burdened responsibilities -

and it somehow connects us

to what really matters to us.

Not to others.

Not to the company, or the husband,

or the bank, or the market, or the wife,

or the boss, or the neighbours, or society...

to us.

It's easy to feel intimidated into
shutting up, isn't it?
When everyone around us seems to be
a success - and we're not.
When everyone seems to know the secret -
and we don't.
With the internet at our fingertips,
it's easier than ever to compare ourselves to others...
so it's that much more important
to keep connected to
our own hearts
and to be grateful that we have this connection
when so many others
seem to have lost their way.

And speaking of hearts and connections...
i watched a documentary called BLACKFISH,
about the killer whales in captivity in theme parks
around the world.
I felt such sadness for these beautiful creatures
that i was inspired to paint again
after days (weeks?) of a dry spell...

i love that art is able to do this.
I think about music sometimes
and i wonder how many hearts
would have drowned in sorrow,
if musicians or composers hadn't sat themselves down
to write/play what they had been feeling in their hearts?
How many hearts HAVE drowned in sorrow
because someone chose not to write?

Art allows me to take sadness
from the pit of my stomach
and put it on paper so it doesn't eat up
my insides.
It may sound stupid to some,
(and totally useless for the whales)
but it makes sense to me.
It's important to me.
So I do it.

I've always been overly sensitive

about the suffering of animals

(hence, the suffering of man...) 

and somehow, putting it on paper

gives my feelings a voice

and eases my own suffering.

Only after i give my feelings a voice through art

can i actually think straight enough

to ACT and do something (if i choose so)

Now i'm inspired to write,
but it's getting late and i must say goodnight!
I'll be back soon.

Wishing you all a week filled with inspiration
and courageous hearts!
xox

For those interested, here's the trailer for the film...