one, tiny, subtle, insect step at a time...

Dripping water hollows out stone,
not through force but through persistence.
- Ovid

hello everyone!

First things first: i hope to be making art (and blogging!)

a little more often than i have been in the past weeks.

And i can't wait to use these Sharpies... ;-)

Lots of adjusting after the holidays, don't you find?

I'm always happy to get back to routine

but it takes me a little while to get there.

I've started work again (outside the home)

for another 3 months.

Breathe in... breathe out... :-)

I always feel a bit like a fish out of water

in such a stiff and systemized environment

but it's temporary, and it allows me the freedom

to be creative for the rest of the time,

and at night, and on weekends. ;-)

How can that NOT be good?

I've come to the conclusion
that if doing other work for a few months in the year
allows me room to breathe and frees my heart from financial worry -
then dammit - i'm in.
And nope, i don't feel like i'm selling out.

I work my ass off to make a living as an artist
but maybe i don't need to
when there are so many other options out there.

For the longest time,
i was holding on to the notion
that i needed to be an artist 100% of the time.
Otherwise, i was not a real artist.
I needed to be in a job where i made art 100% of the time.
I needed to sell my art. All the time. Successfully.
I needed to make a good living as an artist.
And this job also had to fulfill me in every way.
And that i had to be passionate about it.
Fucking recipe for disaster or what...

Note to self: fear and worry about finances kills creativity.
Another note to self: comparing myself to others kills ME.
So even if i wanted all these things,
they weren't happening.
This wasn't my reality.
Actually, my expectations were hurting my art.
Hindering my creativity.
So now, my expectations have changed.
Doesn't mean i've lowered my bar,
just means i've found a way to make it work for me
without sacrificing so much of myself.

And then i read this and it made me smile:

Sometimes, we just need to adjust things

to make our lives feel more like a reflection of who we are.

Happiness happens daily.

Little by little.

Like the dripping water that hollows out stone,

we do little things every day, 

every month,

every year,

to remove the yuckiness in our lives

and bring in the yummy-ness. :-)

Quit a job.

Leave a husband.

Move into a smaller home (or bigger home).

Wear different clothing.

Make new friends.

Learn a new language.

Read different books.

Be open to change

and be ready to embrace

what comes your way.

Let go of fear.

Forgive someone...

So here i am,

slowly surrounding myself again

with things that help me breathe.

Books.

Paints.

TED talks.

Memories.

Quiet morning coffee.

Candles.

Walks.

Do YOU know what helps you breathe easier?

That's my wish for you this week.

To find one thing that makes your life better

even if only in a small, subtle way -

and to do that one thing.

Happy Sunday!

xox

ps: the book pages are from this book: