Sunday, November 17, 2013

we miss you mom...

A year today since mom’s been gone.
At this exact time
one year ago
I held her hand
and reassured her
that she could go
and that we would all be ok.
A year ago at this exact time
it was sunny,
with a gentle breeze
and crisp autumn air
just as it is today.
One year ago,
as my father and I
walked back towards the car
with slumped shoulders
and tear filled eyes,
I saw two students from the nearby university
walking together with coffees at hand
sparkling eyes
smiling faces
and the contrast flooded my heart
with sadness
and wonder.

We made it past
the first Christmas
the first Mother’s day
the first birthday
the first death day,
and now,
we begin all over again.

Life is now fragmented
into before and afters
and when I look into someone’s eyes now
i can see they also have
a before and after
to live with
and it makes me feel
less alone.


  1. (((hugs)))
    Stay inspired!

  2. Oh! I am teary. I lost my father long ago and your words brought it all back. Hugs to you and yours!

  3. So beautifully stated! Thank you.

  4. My dear friend,
    we all have a before and an after.
    but that before and after, must be in the memories of times spent,
    it should not be:
    Before it was joy, and after, sadness,
    for ourselves, and for those still with us.
    Life is never 100% joy, or 100% sadness,
    we live in a sea in which there are sunny days and stormy days. and we must get to the port, with our little boat of life
    filled with memories, but also full of days ahead.
    Go, Pauline, go! :)

  5. So beautifully written Pauline .... Hugs xxx

  6. Beautiful poem....such sad truth...
    It all makes us stronger too!!
    Your mom lives on in your words!! It's nice that you keep her spirit alive!

    Hugs Giggles

  7. You write so beautifully and profoundly and put into words the things that are so hard to say. I hope life brings you peace and joy to balance the pain. Huge hug from Shroo:)x

  8. belated hugs my friend. may this year be just a little bit easier even though she's no further from your heart xx