I'm DONE!!!
I finished my 5 month term at a call center yesterday
and I feel like it's gonna take me 5 months
to find my bearings again.
Needless to say, the first thing I did this morning
was make a pot of coffee - and write.
Without wanting to sound ungrateful,
I couldn't wait to have time to myself again
and to have nothing on the agenda
but writing and painting.
We all do what we need to do to pay the bills,
but i learned a valuable lesson this time around
about how important it is to surround ourselves
with our own tribe -
with people who share the same values,
the same life philosophy.
When I first started there,
I knew I wouldn't "fit like a glove"
with the business types and the corporate setting.
I knew I would need to detach (mentally)
and just focus on doing my work.
Easy peasy.
I would be polite, and respectful of the differences,
considering that I was the one who accepted this job.
What I didn't know
was how alienated I would actually feel.
On my second week there,
I brought this print from home
and put it on my gray cubicle wall
so I would see it every day.
It's a water-colour i did a while back.
The quote may sound hypocritical to some,
because we all know how wealthy Steve Jobs was.
But it's poignant to me,
because he came to this realization
after he was diagnosed with terminal cancer.
Once your health is gone,
it doesn't matter how much money you have in the bank.
But after this print was on my wall a few days,
one of my colleagues came closer to the print,
read the words, and said:
"oh, coming from the mouth of babes.
Easy to say this when you have billions".
To which I replied:
that's why it's so powerful a message.
Because his billions didn't matter anymore.
The only thing that mattered now was time,
and he knew it.
After the 3rd person came over
to comment about the words of Steve Jobs,
i realized my print must have struck a nerve.
Especially with those there who live
as though money was the ONLY thing
that mattered.
The ones who choose to work overtime
rather than spend time with their families,
so they can make as much money as they can
and have all the toys.
The ones who no longer believe in dreams.
And i soon began to realize
that i really didn't fit there.
That I felt alone in the crowded coffee room,
because I had so little in common with the people there.
But the strange this is:
I was totally ok with that.
Actually, I was kinda happy not to fit in.
It felt good to know that I was different
and that I didn't share the same values.
It felt good to see the world
through my eyes
and my time there actually made me realize
how proud I am to be an artist
and to be marching to the beat of my own drum.
The shame I used to feel
at being seen by society as flaky or lost or lazy
is no longer there,
thanks, in part, to office work. :)
To all you artists out there,
TOOT YOUR HORNS!
The world needs your art,
your poems,
your music,
your point of view!
It's a sad place without them.
xx
You are gifted to know what they do not know! Some people will never understand until they find their true gift. You are blessed to know who you are and what you need...just think, people die never having known their true gift. They chase things to impress people they don't like, and have toys they don't have time to enjoy! Sure they do a few more things, take a few more trips...but most of the time their is a huge void they won't admit to! Money is a very nice security blanket...but did you have to sell your soul for it?...do you really need more THINGS? I hope you feel better now that you have TIME...and peace of mind!! Artist and musicians say what others are afraid to!
ReplyDeleteHugs Giggles
thank you Giggles... I knew you would understand. And pass along some sage advice. HUGS. xx
DeleteI can relate to not fitting in, but I like who I am, so I'm not changing. lol And time IS precious. I can't seem to get enough of it. :o(
ReplyDeletei love that you know yourself and like yourself, and so, you are NOT changing! Love it. Yes indeed, time is precious. Hugs to you. xx
DeleteLovely, lovely, lovely! Cheers to tooting horns and beating drums and a bit of a shimmy, too. I'm so happy for you Pauline for seeing the world through your eyes. LOve reading your posts- for they seem to be reflecting how I feel at times. Thnak you. xx
ReplyDeletethank you so much Arti. And yes, you are ABSOLUTELY right. It should not matter to me how others choose to spend their time. I think I was more angry with *me* for having put myself in such a situation again. For money. Always for money. Thank you for the reminder that it's important to do things for love first. Big hugs to you girl. xx
DeleteShould it really matter to us how others see their world or how they prioritise their time? If our time is limited, then why not spend it on our tunes and paint our canvases with the colours we like and be content?
ReplyDelete